Supporting a Partner Who Collects: Finding Balance and Harmony

Living with a partner who collects or hoards requires patience, understanding, and strategic approaches. Here's how to address the situation while maintaining a healthy relationship.

Jo de Serrano OBE DUniv

1/3/20261 min read

Photo of vintage tins of German food stuffs
Photo of vintage tins of German food stuffs

Understand the Psychology

Before attempting changes, recognise that collecting or hoarding often stems from:

  • Emotional attachments to objects

  • Fear of waste or loss

  • Anxiety about future needs

  • Sentimental connections

  • Perfectionist tendencies

This understanding helps guide more compassionate and effective solutions.

Establish Boundaries and Zones

Create clear agreements about:

  • Designated spaces for collections

  • Shared living areas that must remain clutter-free

  • Storage limits for different categories

  • Regular review periods for collections

  • Safety and accessibility requirements

Seek Professional Support

Consider working with:

  • Professional Organisers who specialise in collections

  • Therapists who understand hoarding tendencies

  • Support groups for families of collectors

  • Professional appraisers for valuable collections

Remember that change takes time and patience.

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